I just wanted to thank everyone for the fabulous advice!
I loved getting on and seeing all the tips and insight I hadn't thought about, I just knew that there was probably something out there that I hadn't thought about.
Turns out the poor little lamb was just cold. We bought a space heater, put it in her room last night and she slept like a champ! Seems quite obvious, I guess I just thought, if I'm hot at night, she can't be cold!
Thank you again, it means a lot that I've got great family and friends to help me out.
Thank you and love you all!
16 comments:
i'm interested to see the comments! because we're having the exact same problem. my father-in-law is a doctor and says that they just need to reach a certain weight (he says 20lbs) before they start sleeping through the night. maybe they're just too young.
I am so sorry. I think really it's a phase, growth spurt. All my babies schedules change during growth spurts, sicknesses, and teething, oh and the good ol time change hate it! Just when you think they are on a schedule something always throws them off. And She used to sleep 6-8 hrs so I'm sure she will do soon. I'm not sure that a bottle will help. It may help if your losing your milk or if you don't have enough. I know lots of people who have babies decide to feed them rice cereal or formula to help them sleep and it usually doesn't work. She is teensy so she probably doesn't weigh enough which they do say they
sleep for longer periods of time when they are bigger. And come on no comparing with Finn he's huge! 18 lbs at 4
months he's as big as a 9 month old. I wouldn't ween the binky not now. I think it's a good comfort. Try to not swaddle her shes big enough now. Do the music, binky, blanket, dark, and make sure it's warm. Sorry not much help. You could try letting her cry but I have a hard time with that too. Sorry not much help.
Brooklyn started to sleep through the night at two months old. Trace does not at all. He wakes up at least twice a night. He use to wake up a lot more. At his two month appointment I told the dr that he wanted to eat every two hours during the day and night. The dr told me to start him on rice cereal at three months if he continued. Trace has been on Rice cereal for two weeks now and has done alot better not only in the day but at night as well. He sleeps for a lot longer. Maybe breastmilk or formula just isn't enough for her anymore. Another thing I would try.. is letting her cry it out. I am going to start with Trace soon. Anyway, I am not much help but I hope she sleeps better for you soon. Just know your not the only mommy awake with a three month old :) I feel how you feel!
I had this same problem with Boen, I think he wasn't getting enough. He was the perfect child once I started formula, and we are sisters and since we all may have the same jeans you might try bottles more often. It could be teething or growth spurt or who knows but i'd try anything!
I understand that bottle moms will say giver her a bottle and breastfeeding moms will say stick with it but because you and I have babies that are 2 days apart, I feel like we have a lot in common. Sometimes I read your posts and feel like we live parallel lives. I'm sure Violet is getting enough milk from you. Shaun has nights when he wakes up more than others as well. There is no physiological way that your milk is watered down. The reason Finn sleeps so well is because he weights more. Most babies this age it is considered "sleeping through the night" if they sleep for 6-7 hours at a time. She and Shaun weight the same and I know I have milk. It is just a phase and it will pass. I know it is frustrating. If you are concerned then talk to your pediatrician or I know you know Anne Lowe is an expert at this stuff. I know it is kind of scary when you aren't sure of the amount they are getting, but trust me, she is getting plenty. She probably just likes her mom and wants comfort. I would giver her a binky and let her fuss a bit. I hope that helps! You can do it Sammy! You have worked to hard to give up now!
PS. The only way you would be losing milk is if you are bottle feeding and not pumping. Your body will only make as much as the baby needs so if you aren't breastfeeding her every feeding, you won't make as much. You can get a cheap hand breast pump for like $20. I could probably order you on from the pharmacy for cost if that would help.
Aslo try keeping her up longer at night. I usually let Shaun have a little nap between 7 and 8 but then i keep him up until 9:30 or 10 and he sleeps until 3 or 4 (sometimes 5 if I'm lucky) I kept him up until midnight once and he slept until 6 but that has never happened again.
Good luck!
Hang in there Sammy! All babies are different and she will sleep through the night any day now. Your baby is thriving and doing so well. I am so proud of your determination to give your baby a great start. She may be wanting to eat more to build up your milk. This will happen off and on . If you bottle feed, you will diminish your supply unless you pump. If you need moral support call me or Maren or Anne or her daughter Samantha. Some babies don't sleep the night until they are a year old! Yikes. That won't happen to you. She will do it for you soon. Binkies are great and give babies alot of comfort so don't give up on that . They are also so good for forming their palate and mouth. ( I am a dental person..) You will get through this. Make sure you nap when you can and drink lots of water. xoxo Justine
I think it is just the age. Boston started sleeping through the night at four weeks in addition to really good naps during the day but around that same time he began waking up almost hourly at night, I think he was just bored or wanting reassurance or something.
For the first little while I would go in there to make sure he was okay (before I could tell just by listening to his cry), I'd give him his binky but WOULD NOT GET HIM OUT OF HIS CRIB- that is key.
I know some people disagree with me on this, and that is fine, but babies need to learn to self-soothe. They need to get into the habit of sleeping all night.
So my advice: just let her cry if you know she isn't hungry, wet, cold, etc. Obviously you wouldn't want it to go on for too long but I almost guarantee that in about a half an hour she will go back to sleep on her own and will learn that she doesn't get mom and dad to jump every time she cries.
You will for sure feel guilty about this but it is for her own good, if you are always getting up with her 20 times a night or putting her in your bed to sleep she will get used to that and trust me will still do it when she is 2, 3, 4, etc.
Just give her that much more attention during the day and try to really wear her out the first few days you try this so she is less likely to wake up as much and also not to cry for very long.
Hope it helps, Boston is a great sleeper even now (12-13 hrs at night and 3 hour nap during the day, at 2 1/2) and I'm sure its at least partially because he's learned to get himself back to sleep when (not if) he wakes up during the night.
I can totally empathize! I'm convinced that some babies just sleep through the night and some don't. Some babies are just hungrier than others. I have never fed any of my babies formula, and both my boys woke up in the night until they were one. Chloe has been sleeping 6-7 hours for a while now and she's only 2 months. As long Violet is gaining weight and healthy, your breast milk should be completely nourishing her. If you can muster it, crying it out really does work. But I'm a softie and had a hard time with that. Good luck!!!
One more thing... do you think she could be teething???
So.... I came from two totally different children. Claire started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks (and by that I mean 10:00 PM to 6:00 AM). She did start night waking around 3 months and we'd have to go in her room once a night to put her binky back in (that's a sure sign of a habit). But when she turned 6 months we decided to let her cry it out and she just figured out how to find her own binky and after 3 nights of crying (1 1/2 hours the first night, 1/2 hour the second night, 10 minutes the third night) she was perfect.
I didn't do ANYTHING different with Linus than I did with Claire. But he slept horribly for 8 months. 8 MONTHS my friend!! So I totally feel your pain. I read every sleep book I could get my hands on and tried a number of things. Nothing worked. All I can tell you is that it is in some kids' nature to sleep poorly. I know that doesn't really help, but it might keep YOU sane. If you realize that there might not be a lot you can do, it might make you less crazy. :) Not getting the sleep you need is hard.
A few suggestions.... I doubt hunger is the problem. She looks so healthy and cute and if she is waking up that frequently it isn't hunger - it's a habit or a phase. I can't remember how old she is.... but she should be able to last at least 5-8 hours per night at 3 or 4 months. Some babies take longer than that. But waking more than once per night is not because of hunger. I am not sure if giving her a bottle of formula will make that much of a difference. Like I said - I doubt she's hungry all those times she wakes. But it might work! You never know. The idea of giving her a bottle is excellent anyway.
When you are comfortable with it, you can try CIO. My biggest suggestion with this one is that if you aren't comfortable yet, wait until she is 6 months old. Also, if you try it for a week and it doesn't work, then it isn't going to (at least yet). With Linus we tried CIO at 4 months and he went on and on crying for HOURS for a whole week. We knew then that it wasn't going to work. If it is going to work you should see improvement by the second or third night. CIO didn't work for Linus until he was 8 months old.
Also - take this in mind. Books don't have all the answers. The author thinks they are always right. But they don't know YOUR baby. SO, just read a lot, get some good advice, take what you like, leave the rest, and most of all trust in yourself, and know that this stage WILL pass. Linus is an excellent sleeper now, for naps and bedtime.
I hope you find an answer, and I hope this comment isn't too long!! Good luck.
I really have been racking my brain for you. I was wondering if she started waking up more in the night about the same time you introduced formula? Maybe she has a tummy ache. Just a thought. And I must say amen to your friend Tannie. If i think of anything else I will let you know. Hang in there!
Ok this is my last post I promise. But I thought of a few more tricks that I do and thought I'd see if they help. Do you have a baby swing? The reason I ask is because Shaun loves his and will usually take a 2-3 hour nap in it. It's sometimes the only way I get things done. Sometimes when we have a rough night I put him in it to get him back to sleep. Sometimes I leave him in it and sometimes I take him out and put him back in his bed. The swing is a Fischer Price Nature's Touch. The seat is more like a bucket so he is laying down instead of sitting up. It also sways from side to side. I borrowed mine from a friend so maybe someone would have one you could borrow. I have also seen one on KSL for cheap.
Also Shaun's hands get ice cold as well. I think it bothers me more than it bothers him. I try and wrap him up but he hates being swaddled and always pulls his arms out. He also really likes to snuggle with a blanket up by his face and grab onto it. Maybe putting her to bed with her binky blanket or another one she likes would help.
Again, sorry about all the posts, but since our babies are only 2 days apart, I figure they do a lot of the same things.
I hope she did better for you last night!
Hey Sammy I agree with everyone too. Some babies sleep some take a little longer. Easton didn't sleep through the night until he was 2, Mason slept through the night at 4.5 months and Gray around 8-9months. All different and many things change or disrupt it. Just when you think you've figured it out, growing, teething, age...disrupts the cycle. I love baby wise too. Eat, sleep, play but the main thing that sleep Dr.s say is don't give them negative sleeep associations (binki) because when it falls out you have to go in to put it in. I don't know. Hang in there. Like my sister always told me it is usually a phase- good and cute or a hard one, they usually only last 3-4 weeks so try to enjoy and hang in there. she will do better. And she is beautiful!
Can I just say she is so adorable and you look so good! I've been trying to do Baby Wise too. Liv wakes up every two hours (or sometimes even sooner) all through the night, but then again she is only six weeks old, but I'm really hoping she will start sleeping a little longer. Poor Jeff, we keep him up all night and then he has to go to work in the morning. It's actually been a little better this week but not because she is sleeping longer, only because I am getting used to the idea that I'll never sleep again HA!
I know she loves her binky (she uses the big ugly green one because thats what they gave her in the hospital) but I almost want to try going without it because I have to put it back in like 10 times every night. I don't know if I could let her CIO, I think I would feel too bad. The other day when I was changing her, she cried so hard I was worried she wasn't breathing and I felt terrible! And that was for less than a minute! But then again, she was exhausted after that so it probably works!
We made a lot of progress with breastfeeding a few weeks ago, but it kept getting worse and worse until I've just started pumping again because I want to make sure she is gaining weight. As soon as I go back to giving her a bottle with breastmilk or formula (at night), she is so much happier. I'm hoping I can keep pumping for another month and then I'm going to have to make the switch. I have a really nice pump that our insurance paid for but when we move back to Utah at Thanksgiving I will have to give it back to the hospital and I really don't think I could pump with anything other than a hospital grade pump. It is hard enough with a $2,000 one, let alone a cheap one. I'm not sure if formula at night has helped at all, but I have liked it just for the fact that I can make a bottle in a few seconds and she eats it really fast and back to sleep faster than if I were pumping or breastfeeding.
Anyways, I hope you have a better week! Let me know if you find something that works:)
holy smokes you got a lot of good advice here.
I'm glad baby Vi is sleeping well again (for all 3 of your sakes). That was/is the hardest part of parenting is not knowing what your baby needs.
I love that last picture of her. Those rosy cheeks are adorable!
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